Burning soul pages... an excerpt

Here's a snippet of a secret project I'm writing that I shared on my Facebook pages, but I thought I'd make it more permanent and share it on here. It's dark, emotional, and full of heartache, but it's something I've been aching to write. Slowly but surely, it'll get done. Enjoy!

There was a time I wrote every thought, emotion, and desire into my diary. It was a thick book full from the years of abuse and heavy with ink.

Not anymore.

It was all part of that section of my dismal life filed under "Used to do". I "used to" pour my soul out on those pages as if my existence depended on each curvature of letters woven together and purged onto each page. It fueled me, healed me, and worst of all, kept my sanity for my eyes alone.

That was until, of course, the one person I loved tainted it in the worst possible way. He hadn't love me enough to leave it be when he found it one day, nor could he hold himself back from reading my words. He stole that from me. And when he spat my own phrases back to me, his acid words reading off the pages of my innermost soul, it was detrimental. It warped something inside me that day. He asked things I couldn't or wouldn't answer. Things about ex-lovers, desires, crimes of my soul, and secrets never meant for the light of day. Secrets about him. Secrets I didn't even want to know or care to recall anymore. Yet his bitterness was apparent and his need to know was greater than anything he held in his blackened heart for me.

There are things we should only tell ourselves; hidden things meant for no one else but our own hearts, and he'd taken them from me.

When he handed back the book, it was no longer mine anymore. Its purpose had shattered. The soft leather bands on the corners and silky expanse of tapestry gracing the cover with a picturesque landscape of a Japanese countryside filled with cherry blossoms, bamboo stalks, and made-up geishas delicately holding tiny umbrellas in their hands no longer filled me with an old, familiar comfort.

He'd fractured that part when he had read my words off those pages in his bitter tongue and words dripping with a resentment I had denied for some time. Even when it was over and he walked away leaving me in silence, I knew things had changed. I held the small book tight to my chest before flipping through my pages riddled with inky blots and gestures, full of years of thoughts I'd written, doodled, and mused about. Nothing would ever be the same. They couldn't be now. He'd made sure of it.

It was then that I committed the worst travesty against my own self. Something I never thought I'd ever fathom or believe I could be capable of doing. After moments of numbing stillness, I reacted. I followed through by tearing each delicate page from the bindings, shredding them one by one with my fingers before burning the entire diary soaked with details of my life up until then in an all-consuming act of arson. As I watched it burn, the flames weren't cathartic nor did it leave me feeling any better or whole. Each page curled up into ashes, representing the person I'd been up until that day. It was a person I'd never see, read about, or hear from again.

When the flames died away and there was nothing but soot left to sift through, I went on, never speaking about the diary again. It was no more, and I never kept another. Never wrote about my days, my thoughts, my love, my hate, my detrimental idiocracies or my achievements ever again. I'd been the girl on those burnt pages. A living, breathing and fully alive entity echoing her essence across each brittle page.

That girl was gone forever, and I swore I'd never be fragile again.

"Untitled Project"
Copyright 2016 Alexia Purdy


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Underground & Silence (New World Series) Release Day Blitz!

Coming Valentine's Day!
Underground & Silence
New World series
by Janelle Stalder

Love isn't something you find.
Love is something that finds you.

Phoenix has spent her whole life fighting. All she's ever wanted was to return the world to a peaceful state, and bring down the New World Order. But now she finds herself in a different sort of battle. No longer set in the streets of New Berlin, the fighting has moved beneath them, in a vicious underground fighting ring run by outlaws bent on causing trouble. And if that isn't hard enough, she's stuck with the one person who loves to fight more than she does - Trent McKay. Now the race is on to get out of their new prison and back home - before they end up killing each other.
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It is better to be seen and not heard…

A firm believer of observing and listening rather than adding to the noise surrounding her, Pixie has always been the quiet one out of the Archers. Her intelligence and quiet confidence makes her the perfect choice to join Garrett, Tyler and Missy on their mission to get their friends back. But when she enters the underground network run by Sebastian Black, she suddenly finds her voice. Bastian rattles her like no other, breaking her silence. He sees and hears her more than anyone has in her entire life. But how can she trust a man like him? Now it’s a battle of wills, between what her head tells her, and what her heart insists.
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Stalk the Author:
Janelle Stalder
Janelle Stalder was born and raised in Brampton, Ontario. At an early age she developed a love for literature. Her debut novel, Eden, was the first book in a series of four, released in September of 2011. Since then she has released an Adult Dystopian Romance series, the New World Series, hitting the best sellers list on Amazon. She has also released a Mature YA/NA novel, Brush Strokes, that stayed on the best sellers list for contemporary romance for sixteen straight weeks. She is a strong supporter of other independent authors, and loves to interact with her readers. When she's not writing, Janelle is at home with her husband, two children, Aiden and Elora, her little bun in the oven that is on the way, and her two furry children, Alice and Lily. She now resides in a small town in Ontario in her old, possibly haunted, century home.
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It Happened at the Book Fest

Two Books. One Wild Event.

On sale February 14 thru 23!!!

Welcome to the Lake Morgan Book Festival!
Each year, Mr. Denton McCray and his eclectic team of volunteers hosts the most anticipated, and the most mysterious, book fest in a cozy, lakeside community near the Rocky Mountains in Colorado. Though many accounts have highlighted strange occurrences, readers are drawn to the book fest each year by the hundreds, and authors are thrilled to receive a hand-delivered invitation to participate.
The season is autumn. The day is overcast. There's an electric crackle in the air that foreshadows the arrival of approaching storms. Tops of trees sway under the weight of winds that bear more than the threat of rain.  The book fest takes place in an old building that once served as a high school.  It has been decades since students roamed the halls ... living students, that is.    

The Lake Morgan Book Fest opens at 6 PM and runs until midnight.  So, grab a cup of hot tea, and dive in!

Within these pages, readers will discover just how weird the Lake Morgan Book Fest can get.  
Tales of time travel, science fiction, paranormal, speculative fiction, urban fantasy, comedy, and even a little romance await discovery!  

Authors of This Volume:
Kimberley Montpetit
Tyber North
Belle Whittington
A.L. Kessler
Linda M. Au

Within these pages, readers will discover just how sexy things can get at the Lake Morgan Book Fest.
Tales of romance, paranormal, and erotica await discovery! 

This volume is for more mature audiences.

Authors of This Volume:
Alexia Purdy
Dicey Grenor
Mia Bishop
Lizzy Pope
J.L. McCoy

AUTHORS' PICK: Favorite lines from each story

Find out more about the authors and the project at the website.